Cat haikus

13Jul09

I’m tired and uninspired, so here’s some recycled humor.

This post goes out to my friend Annie and her friend Mollie.

My brain: walnut-sized.
Yours: largest among primates.
Yet, who leaves for work?

Most problems can be
Ignored. The more difficult
Ones can be slept through.

My affection is
conditional. Don’t stand up,
It’s your lap I love.

Cats can’t steal the breath
Of children. But if my tail’s
Pulled again, I’ll learn.

I don’t mind being
Teased, any more than you mind
A skin graft or two.

So you call this thing
Your “cat carrier.” I call
These my “blades of death.”

Seeking solitude
I am locked in the closet.
For once I need you.

Tiny can, dumped in
Plastic bowl. Presentation,
One star; service: none.

Your mouth is moving;
Up and down, emitting noise.
I’ve lost interest.

The food in my bowl
Is old, and more to the point
Contains no tuna.

So you want to play.
Will I claw at dancing string?
Your ankle’s closer.

There’s no dignity
In being sick – which is why
I don’t tell you where.



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