Drowning

03Jul13

change-dune lao tsu BLOG

I woke up this morning gasping desperately for air, reaching toward the ceiling with my right arm.

Moments before I’d been walking next to a friend. She’d gone ahead of me toward the white, frothy place where oceans become land. But — just a few yards behind her — I’d sunk silently into the sand. I screamed though I knew she couldn’t hear me.

I once read somewhere that you shouldn’t struggle against quicksand. So, in my dream, I tried to stay still as I yelled for help. Yet still I sank deeper. “Don’t fight it,” I thought. “Stay calm.” But the cold, wet earth was reclaiming my body. I thought of Esteban and of my family. I held up my arm — fingers outstretched, in one last act of hope and defiance — as the sand closed in around my face.

With the benefit of daylight, the symbolism is clear: My home, which flooded with water a few months ago, is now flooded with dust. I’m drowning in details — floors, walls, fixtures, doors — and I’m deluged with calls. Money is slipping through my hands as a steady stream of workmen come to ply their trades.

I have a running conversation with a neuroscientist friend about the meaning and/or purpose of dreams. Are they just brain poop, our synapses’ undigested leftovers? Or are they an insight from deep within our subconscious?

Either way, the message I’m getting is clear: “Don’t fight. Stay calm. And stop turning everything into a metaphor.”

Which is exactly why I’m not going to mention the sinkhole that’s forming in front of the house …

Sinkhole 1080951 BLOG



14 Responses to “Drowning”

  1. That’s one scary dream though!

    • 2 hmunro

      Right, lauracarteroriginals? For once, I didn’t need a cup of coffee to get my heart pounding in the morning. 🙂

  2. So scary. I used to put a lot more stock in dreams, but lately I feel they are just our brains defragmenting the day like a computer.

    • 4 hmunro

      I like your theory, Chris … and I hope you’re right. But just in case, will you give me some tips to improve my backstroke? 🙂

  3. You are great. Hang in there. I definitely know the feeling.

    • 6 hmunro

      Thanks for your kind and encouraging words, Tom. They mean a lot because I know you really have been there.

  4. Hang in there! I do, however, think I am glad that I rarely remember my dreams.

    • 8 hmunro

      Thanks, Patti! May you always remember only your good dreams. 😀

  5. 9 Alex H

    This post is incredible.Nice share and keep on with good work.Alex,Thanks.

    • 10 hmunro

      Wow, Alex. Thanks very much for your kind words. Your comment made my day.

  6. Not drowning, but waving (with apologies to Stevie Smith) 🙂

    • 12 hmunro

      How on earth do you always find something witty and apropos to say? Well spoken, sir! Thanks for the (much needed) laugh.

  7. I’m nominating you for the very inspiring blogger award! Check out the following post of mine for more details 🙂 http://sincerelykaterz.wordpress.com/2013/07/05/freedom-of-speech/

    • 14 hmunro

      Thank you so much for your very kind nomination, dear Kate! I will try to round up some bloggers whom I haven’t already nominated for this award. And I will very much look forward to following your own blog as your newest subscriber! Keep up the great work!


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